(...continued)
After not sleeping all night (the lady next door finally had her baby, thank heaven), Momma was tired and scared and hungry (they wouldn't let us eat, Squiddy!) and in pain. Daddy woke up and held my hand. Grandma and Grandpa came over around 8:30a.m. and sat with us.
The doctor (not the mean one that threatened us with her harsh words, though) made her way into our room and told us that we were going to begin Pitocin to jump start my labor. After being checked, Momma had not dilated at all. The doctor then went on to tell me that Pitocin was even stronger than the drug that Momma had had last night and she not only wanted to try it on us, but she wanted to work her way into my closed, tucked back cervix and break my water. This was dangerous and Momma was unsure of what to do.
I freaked out and asked for the doctor to come back in a little while after we'd talked about it, and since your heart (which had shown no signs of funkyness -- besides the seven minute smoosh, of course -- since the NST the day before) was stable and on the monitor, she agreed. Daddy called up Miss Michelle, our Doula, and asked her what she thought about everything that the doctor proposed.
Oh Squiddy, we were so lucky to have Michelle. She not only calmed Momma down, but she explained what she had seen go down with women who were in Momma's situation and had had the drugs and procedures done (both good and bad). Her words, which were not pushy or demanding like the doctors', helped us make an informed decision as a family. Grandma and Grandpa and Daddy and I talked about it for a bit and these were the options that we had:
One: Go home. Just because your heart had two little blips on one Non-Stress Test, didn't mean that Momma would have a "dead baby." We'd go to all my upcoming appointments and regularly scheduled Non-Stress Tests, and then we'd go into labor naturally and have you as planned.
Two: Go ahead with the drugs, see if they worked, even though they could be even more dangerous to both you and I. If a 1/4 of a dose of a drug that was less harsh than Pitocin did what it did to us, what would a full dose of an even stronger drug do to you? A lot of times, women whose bodies aren't ready for labor (like mine!), elect to get the drugs and end up having some sort of problem that can endanger the baby. Sometimes, even if everything goes all right with the drugs, long hours of hard, un-natural labor might cause the woman to end up needing a c-section due to stress or fatigue.
Three: Cut to the chase and elect to have a c-section. Momma would be rested, and in control and there were no chances of the funky drugs doing anything to you or me.
Your safety and life was worth way more than "trying out" the drugs and hoping that they wouldn't hurt us, and Momma was WAY too shaken up to just go home and hope nothing happened to you.
The doctor seemed hesitant, but it was my first decision as a mother and I still stand by it. She said we'd have you within the next hour or so. HOLY CRAP! How's that for making an entrance?!
A weight of your possible harm was lifted off of Momma's shoulders and then the room was abuzz with excitement! We called the Grandma and Grandpa Clark and Auntie Effie and Uncle Joey and Matt and Natty. This was a happy, calm situation and we were all so happy!
Daddy put on his scrubs.
[Paging Doctor Daddy. Please report to Momma's room.]
I got a nice hat to wear and the doctors started prepping the O.R. for your arrival.
[I think I pulled the blue off well, no?]
They gave Momma an antacid right before we went surgery that made her puke 'till she saw white dots, but it was reassuring knowing that there was nothing in my belly to interrupt your birth.
We said our goodbyes to our family (both sets of your Grandmas and Grandpas had arrived, as well as your Auntie and Uncle Joey) and they wheeled Momma into the operating room. I was still having slight contractions, but nothing could get dampen my excitement for your arrival. Daddy was allowed to go into the operating room with Momma, Squiddy! Never in my life had I been blessed enough to have someone, let alone the man I love the most, in the operating room with me.
They put an epidural into Momma's back -- I jumped a bit at the first poke, Ouch! -- and then things got crazy. I could feel my back getting numb. Then Momma's butt cheeks, then thighs and legs and ankles and feet. And I MEANT plural feet! It was so weird, I could feel the foot that wasn't there, I could feel my calf and knee. SO crazy! They put a tiny dose (tiny at my urging) of pain meds into Momma's I.V., so I was feeling like a rainbow. I felt as puffy as a unicorn and as happy as a peach. And I was going to meet you soon! And Daddy was there! I swear, Squiddy, it was by far one of the coolest things I've ever experienced.
They let Daddy into the room and he sat beside me and held my hand. I kept asking him if he was okay -- Daddy is just a bit squeamish -- and he said that he was doing fine, but didn't want to look over the curtain. I don't blame him... My guts probably looks a bit gross.
....
and then we heard you.
Your little cry!
You were here and alive and screaming with life!
Everything we had worked and hoped and pray for had come true.
(My heart still swells just writing that!)
I saw them carry you over to the examination table, but I couldn't see much.
I told Daddy to go be with you and to take a picture.
Roman Archer-James Clark
June 19th, 2011
12:23 p.m.
5 pounds, 7 ounces
18 inches long
____
And now I have two loves of my whole life.
Ahhhh! Amazing!!! <3 <3 <3 <3 <3!!! I had the scary heart rate crash emergency c-section happen and it was so stressful and shocking. I'm glad yours was good, relaxing and felt safe :) :) Such an awesome baby boy!!
Posted by: Amanda | 06/25/2011 at 02:29 PM
This put tears to my eyes Steph!!! I am so happy for you and ur lil family of 3!!!!
Posted by: Ashley | 06/25/2011 at 02:29 PM
Ooh Violet, this story put tears to my eyes. You were so brave, and squiddy looks so healthy and strong! All the best of luck & happiness for the three (! :-) of you!
Posted by: Eliza | 06/25/2011 at 02:40 PM
Gorgeous, he looks amazing and I love this story. So glad he's here and healthy :)
Posted by: Caitlin | 06/25/2011 at 02:58 PM
Amazing! And hooray for you for making an empowered decision on how *you* wanted your birth to go. So, so happy that all three of you made it happy and healthy. Congrats, and welcome to Roman!
Posted by: Sonja | 06/25/2011 at 03:00 PM
Holy moly! Congratulations to you and your brave new little family!
And yes, you totally pull off that blue cap!! :)
Posted by: Jo | 06/25/2011 at 03:32 PM
I have loved every minute of hearing about this journey!!!!!
Posted by: Emily Crall | 06/25/2011 at 03:38 PM
Oh, I'm so glad that you weren't pressured into more drugs. Thank goodness for calm informed doulas and family. I'm happy that things went well after the scary drug incident and that hes a happy healthy baby.
Posted by: Miranda | 06/25/2011 at 04:00 PM
Congratulations on squid-kid's arrival! So excited for you & your family.
Posted by: Lynn_Read | 06/25/2011 at 05:08 PM
kamika was 5lb 7 too, and 19 inches LOL LOL LOL LOL and she will be 14 in two weeks LOL
Posted by: tassie | 06/25/2011 at 05:29 PM
"and then we heard you. Your little cry! You were here and alive and screaming with life!"
-- I burst out crying. So happy to read :) Love youuuuuu!
Posted by: Leigh-Ann | 06/25/2011 at 06:55 PM
Congratulations Stephanie. So happy for you! Your bravery paid off big time!!! Proud of you too :] <3
Posted by: [email protected] | 06/25/2011 at 07:43 PM
I love his story - what a handsome baby boy I am so happy for your dream come true! Squiddy is destined to do great things just like his Mama.
Posted by: Mary Ann | 06/25/2011 at 07:48 PM
Congratulations! You have a beautiful baby boy. I'm so pleased to read these last couple of post, I was one of those gals that was induced with yucky drugs & it didn't turn out so well with an emergency c-section. I'm so glad you got to make the call & have a happy healthy baby. I want to slap your 1st Dr in the face for what she said, sometimes they're so stupid. I hope u have a nice speedy recovery from your Caesar. What a lovely name you have chosen for a lovely boy.
Posted by: Katie of Sweet Rustic | 06/26/2011 at 04:38 AM
Awesome!!!
Posted by: Lori Endres | 06/26/2011 at 12:41 PM
He is a handsome lil man and I love his name, I have a son named Roman Atticus, great choice!:)
Posted by: Emily | 06/27/2011 at 11:43 AM
What an incredible story and CONGRATULATIONS!! I was getting choked up just reading your post and I haven't even had a baby! :)
He's so precious and your little family is beautiful.
-Lisa
Posted by: bein good to me | 06/27/2011 at 06:40 PM
oh man this one made me cry!! so happy for you!
Posted by: Megan Y | 06/28/2011 at 11:47 PM
so happy and full of joy for your lovely lil family!!!!
Posted by: Kamika | 06/30/2011 at 07:52 AM
Our birth stories are similar..my babe's heart rate was funky too and so I got a c-section...it's a weird thing isn't it? The recovery stinks, but my babe is 8 weeks now and I'm feeling back to normal! Good luck! (And I love the name Roman..we had a dog that we named Roman..not to compare your darling baby to a stinky dog, but it's just a great name!)
Posted by: [email protected] | 07/02/2011 at 02:53 PM
congrats!!
He's precious
My little brothers name is James Clark and he is a wonderful man - so I really like his name to boot!
Posted by: jacquelyn | lark + linen | 07/04/2011 at 12:06 PM