We found out we were pregnant on June 9th, a few weeks before our "We're not having any luck getting pregnant so lets go to Disneyland!" trip. Sure, the trip was partially for Roman since you know, Disneyland is for kids (blasphemy!), but I wanted to celebrate the fact that NOT being pregnant was advantageous and I could at this place. Pregnant ladies couldn't ride Space Mountain or Indiana Jones. Pregnant ladies can't bounce around on rides go all crazy-go-nuts in a theme park. Pregnant ladies don't have the energy to power through the park all day long and stay 'till closing while pushing a sleeping toddler in a stroller. Hell yes. I was going to celebrate my empty uterus and the freedom that it granted me while gorging on food and pushing my sleep limits.
We enjoyed Disneyland for the most part. Who doesn't enjoy disneyland, right? I was a bit cranky and tired, but it was freaking Disneyland people, so I pulled through. ;) No "grown-up' rides for me, but we had a whole lot of fun just enjoying the park at a slower pace. Having two two year old with us made for a MUCH slower pace than I was used to. It was great though and I can't wait to take Roman again. My evening sickness hasn't kicked in yet either, so gorge I did!
When we got home from our vacation, the fatigue really kicked in. It pretty much kicked me in the face. POW. If you have ever been pregnant while trying to take care of a rambunctious, BUSY toddler, you'll know. I thank God everyday for my awesome Mom and my In-Laws. They have been my saving grace. Roman has been to 'Camp Grandma's' and 'Danny (Granny) Daycare' more times than I can count and it afforded me the rest that my body was demanding. In the first trimester, I HAD (I repeat, HAD) to take a nap come Roman's naptime. I would literally trudge to my bed, toss back te covers and crawl in. Sleep was (and still is!) my friend.
My Mother in Law has come over a few times and helped me with house work. Dustin has taken over the dishes because the smell of old and mixed food makes me get hot-spit mouth. Gross. I've been trying to save my energy for the things that matter, like making breakfast for Roman and I, and just staying awake. Dustin has really been my hero. My laundry hero. My changer of poopy diapers hero. My cuddle hero. My crazy pregnancy hormones crying episodes hero. He's just my hero, period. I am so thankful for him.
So, yes. A few days after we got back from Disneyland (and after being exposed to a sick, hacking lady during a workshop -- stay HOME, people), I caught a really bad chest cold. Ugh. I ended up coughing so hard that I pulled a rib muscle and had to go to the E.R. to make sure it wasn't a cancer thing. (We got to see the baby while there because I freaked out and there it was, our tiny little mush ball, heart beating away on the screen.) Having one lung makes getting colds very hard on me. The coughing is intense and with my asthma, breathing is rough. No wonder I coughed so hard, right? The cold went away, but the pulled muscle took about a month to resolve it self.
I had a bleeding scare around 11 weeks. It was painful and awful and resulted in an E.R. trip. I was bleeding bright red and cramping and was freaked the heck out. Mom took me in, Dustin got off of work and my so did my Daddy. (Daddy makes everything better, even when it is bad stuff.) I thought it was the end of this baby. I really, truly did. I remember sitting there in that room, on the white hospital bed, my Mom holding me as I cried my eyes out, shaking like a leaf as I bled. It was horrible. A nightmare. Once you lose a baby, that fear never leaves you. The bleeding brought back so many emotions and memories from my first miscarriage, so much heartache, especially since I was farther along this time. The though of having to pass something that looked like a tiny baby, my tiny baby, made me (and still makes me) sick to my stomach. Thankfully, the bleeding stopped after about an hour in the ER and I was sent home with instructions on what to do if the bleeding came back. I didn't have much more than spotting after that. A few weeks later at a routine birth-defect detection ultrasound, we discovered that I had a hematoma. There is a bleed between part of my placenta and my uterine wall and it's serious. One in 10 women with this will lose their baby before 20 weeks, either due to the hematoma dislodging the placenta while inside me or from surgical removal to save the mother's life. If the hematoma were to rupture and cause me to furiously bleed, the doctors might have to abort my child in order to keep me from bleeding out and dying. Or, and this is what we're hoping for, the hematoma will heal and absorb back into my body and the pregnancy will go on like normal. There isn't anything they can do, either. No drugs to stop any bleeding. Nothing. We just have to wait. Think 'normal' thoughts for us, okay?"
I have been "taking it easy" since the bleed - Doctor's orders. Lots of resting on the couch, no lifting anything over 10 pounds (including Roman, which has been difficult), lots and lots of water. We even upgraded our cable because of all the couch loafing. (One good thing to come out of the bleed! Ha!)
I had a VERY painful kidney stone (which I will write more about) a few weeks ago that was... well... intense. It resulted in my 3rd (THIRD, people!) E.R. visit this pregnancy. It turned out fine and hopefully I won't get anymore while pregnant -- or ever again, please. Pregnant women are more likely to get them and I DO have kidney problems, so we'll see.
We still haven't found out the gender of this baby. I have a feeling that it's a girl, but I might be wrong. I was right with Roman, though. We'll just have to wait for another month! I go in for another level 2 ultrasound in two weeks (more detailed) to check on the hematoma and maybe we will be able to sneak a peak at his or her privates to find out who we're going to love. With the bleeding, even though it didn't last long and hasn't continued, I find it hard for me to REALLY get into this pregnancy. Really fall in love and not worry. Trusting God, as natural as it should be, is hard for me when it comes to this. I know that whatever happens will because it's meant to, but as a controlling person, it's majorly hard to let go and let God. Maybe I'm just weak. Who knows. Being pregnant is hard.
Names! We have names picked out for both a boy and a girl! The girl name (which we LOVE) is one that we picked out 6 or 7 years ago. There is no question as to what our daughter's name will be and I feel like I already know parts of her. It's crazy. The boy name is that we agreed on when we first started trying to get pregnant a year ago. It's cute and the nickname holds a special place in my heart because of my history. I'm so excited to see who we'll get!
This summer didn't quiet turn out how I expected it to -- nausea during summer bounty time! Fruit has been good the whole time, though. I've thoroughly enjoyed me some peaches and watermelon. Lemon cucumbers, too. Veggies have been ehhh up until now. I went the first 2.5 months without eating a salad. (If you know me, that's like WHOA.) I'm just now starting to get my appetite back and I want to eat ALL the foods. Except burgers. They're disgusting, and when I was first pregnant and had evening sickness, the mere thought of a burger would make me gag. Totally funny since all I craved while pregnant Roman WAS burgers. Greasy, onion-y In-n-Out burger. Ugh. Sickening. Now when we drive by, I have to hole my breath. It's making my stomach turn right now just thinking about them.Yuck.
We're hoping that the next 24 weeks go smoothly. No more bleeding. No more kidney stones or pulled muscles. Kidney function that stays the same as it currently is. Controlled blood sugar. No cancer scares. Nothing funky, just normal.
Lots of love,