There was a discussion on a board that Kristen of Project:BABY posted about the other day. Have you guys seen her blog before? She's adorable and kind, and her Miss Tinsley has the fluffiest Big Bird hair ever. I see a lot of similarities between the two of us (mostly in the love/family/marriage department) so it's fun to see what I think my life would be like if I were a Southern (south-eastern?) Belle with hair of fire.
Anyway, the post. It was about people blaming their PostPardum Depression (among other things) on bloggers who chose to blog mostly the positive in their lives. I get the rift that the people were saying that bloggers who chooses to only show the good make them feel bad about their lives because they feel that they can never measure up to the "extravagant, perfect life" that a blogger puts on display.
While I see how bloggers might want to stay away from the un-pretty in life and keep the boring, more personal details off of their space, I am all about that. In my experience, exposure = tolerance, even if you're the one learning to tolerate yourself. I personally love blogging about feeling like crap, having sad days, being scared, fighting with my spouse and how hard and trying it is to be a mother. Now, I don't love feeling all of those negative things, but I know and hope that in sharing and normalizing my "dirty laundry", it might help others with similar problems (... everyone?) feel that it's okay to not have to be "on" all the time. That counters are messy and dishes are dirty in most homes. How many time have I cropped my disgusting burners out of a food post? A LOT. The only time those puppies are cleaned is when my Mother-In-Law comes over and silently cleans them (and the microwave, too.. don't think I don't notice! I love you!). It's an ugly part of my life, but it's a NORMAL part of my life. It isn't vintage or crafty or perfectly matched to my purse... it's burnt, gross food bits that I loathe cleaning up. EVERY single one of us, Kristen, Elsie, Leigh-Ann, James, you, me, she and he, nig and small bloggers, famous actresses and chefs and hobos with houses, we ALL have a "blog life" that we display and a real life that we see everyday. Happy faces that we plaster on on days that shake our foundations. Tears that we wipe right before we take a picture. All of us. Please don't let pretty, happy blogs get you down, friends! Don't feel like less of a Mother/Wife/Girlfriend/Daughter/Friend because your life isn't always sunshine and vintage - no ones life is - I guarantee it. Behind every pretty blog is a toilet that is screaming to be scrubbed or burners that look like mine.
Learning to not judge myself based on other bloggers and the life that I assume a blogger has, well, that was a lesson that I very recently learned myself. It was hard trying to re-wire my jealous heart, but let me tell you, with Dustin by my side and God holding my heart, the pressure that's been lifted off of my shoulders is immense! Everyone is real. Everyone poops (gross, sorry... true, though!). Everyone is just trying to get through each day with a smile on their face and a dream in their heart. Please, please don't let anyone's optimism let you feel like you're lacking. You're amazing, friend. :)
And because I didn't want to leave you without a fresh picture of the little boy who is my world...
(So serious and SERIOUSLY the cutest kid I know.)
Have a mighty fine Thursday, my loves.
XO,
Violet
